Yeah, another damn script that I wrote, hope you think it's funny...
(Phone rings)
Operator: (calm) Hello, 9-11, what's your emergency?
Girl: (nervous) Hello... it... it's my boyfriend... I...
Operator: (calm) Ma'am, please tell me what happened
Girl: (crying) My... my boyfriend... he... he's been shot... I think he's dead! (intense sobbing)
Operator: (calm) Ma'am, please tell me what happened
Girl: (crying) We were just walking... it was a beautiful day... he... he said he had to tell... tell me something... (intense sobbing)
Operator: (calm) Ma'am, please calm down
Girl: (intense sobbing)
Operator: (stern) Ma'am, I need to know the details, please calm down
Girl: (calmer, nervous) We... we were walking... and... this... this little kid in a diaper... he came out of the bushes... oh God!...
Operator: (calm) Go on...
Girl: (more nervous) he... he came out of the bushes... and... shot him with an arrow!...
Operator: (calm) Where are you now ma'am?
Girl: (crying) So... so... much blood!... so... much blood! (intense sobbing)
Operator: (stern) Ma'am, tell me where you are so I can send help
Girl: (calm) Wait!... what's that!
Operator: (stern) Ma'am...
Girl: (angry) Hold on!... I see him!...
Operator: (angry) Ma'am, stay on the line, don't approach him!
Girl: (silence)
Operator: (angry) Ma'am?
Girl: (slience)
Operator: (worried) Ma'am are you still there?
Girl: (silence)
Operator: (very worried) Ma'am... answer me!
Girl: (scared) I went after him!... he started shooting at me!... I think I'm safe now!
Operator: (scared) Tell me where you are ma'am
Girl: (calm) Eisenhower Park
Operator: (calmer) Help will be there shortly ma'am, please stay on the line
Girl: (angry) Wait!... I see him again!
Operator: (worried) Ma'am!
Girl: (silence)
Operator: (angry) Ma'am!
Girl: (in the background) Get back here you little bastard!
(Phone disconnects)
Operator: (stunned) ...Ma'am?...
(Phone rings)
Operator: (calm) 9-11, what's your emergency?
Boy: (high pitched, worried) Hello, this is Cupid!
Operator: (cam) Sir, what's your emergency?
Cupid: (out of breath) I'm being chased by a crazy bitch!
Operator: (calm) Sir, please tell me what happened
Cupid: (out of breath) I was just... out in the woods... doin' my job... he was in love wit' her!
Operator: (calm) Who was in love with who sir?
Cupid: (nervous) I didn't mean to kill no one man! (crying)
Operator: (stern) Who did you kill sir? tell me what happened!
Cupid: (scared) Then that crazy bitch started chasin' me around!... She got my bow!... been shootin' at me!
Operator: (worried) Sir...
Cupid: (scared) It was supposed to be for love!
Operator: (worried) Sir...
Cupid: (scared) Ahhh Shit!... Here she comes again!
Girl: (screaming in the background) I'll get you! you little bastard!
(Phone disconnects)
Operator: (worried) Sir?... Sir?...
There it is, in all of it's glory or what not...
ANYWAY, recommendations shall we?
So, here we go! The album Actor by St. Vincent is my album of choice for this post. St. Vincent got her start with Sufjan Stevens, it's a wonderful album that should be listened to and my film recommendation is District 9 which is a sci-fi film set in South Africa about a race of aliens who get stuck on Earth and treated as second class citizen and forced into slums. The whole film plays out as a metaphor for apartheid but still has the ridiculous action sequences of a standard sci-fi film.
But there we go, another one down the drain! Take it easy!
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
The Forty-third Dimension-- Black in French
Hello folks! This blog post shall relate to a genre of film that I enjoy and that ladies and germs is Film Noir! but before I get into all of that, I'm going to squeeze in some shit to start out on!
First off, I just played the game World of Goo and it's pretty fun, it's a physics based puzzle game where you have to build structures with goo balls. I may be behind on it but it'd would be a good app to get on an iPad or iPhone I'm sure. Another one is Plants vs. Zombies it may be lame but I really dig this game, you plant a bunch of plants that work like guns to kill invading zombies and then the last one, as everyone knows, is Angry Birds, which is also pretty fun. ANYWAY, there are some apps for you if you want games and shit...
Also, there's this youtube channel, dunno why, but I call it Shit Cats! You'll see... http://www.youtube.com/user/KimKwitter
Next in the line are my recommendations (as usual). For the film, I'm going to be super lame and let you see a side of me that I'm not proud of and say Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story (2007). That's right, this incredibly stupid comedy film that satirizes music documentaries like Walk The Line and The Doors. I thought the film was actually hilarious and great if you want a mindless, lowbrow sort of comedy. For the album today, I'll go with Surfer Rosa from Pixies. This is a great piece of alternative rock, it's great.
Okay, now onto the good stuff, film noir. If you don't know what a film noir is, it's generally a hollywood crime drama. Classic film noir lasted from the 1940s to the 1950s and had a black and white style that was similar to German expressionism. Film noir came out of the pulp crime fiction of the Depression. It is a very difficult genre to classify due to the fact that it could span and include many different subjects. One reason for the rise of the noir style in America was due to German expressionist film makers, like Fritz Lang, fleeing to America in the 30s and 40s to get away from Nazi control of Germany and bringing that style with them. Classic noir generally had a low budget and lacked a well known star. They were essentially B-movies that didn't always get the recognition they deserved until after they were released. Many of these films revolved around strong women, generally with questionable intent, which was uncommon at the time. The femme fatale was a common character archetype in noir, along with the brooding and hardened detective. Many of the popular and beloved noir films were A-list endeavors also, many of the noir directors that may have started off doing b-list movies eventually went onto direct A-list films also.
Noir is generally seen as an American film form, however, there are noir films from all over the world. France, Britain, Italy and Japan are just a few of the international entities that produced classic noir films.
The popularity of noir carried on into the 60s and became a style that is generally classified as neo-noir. Generally these new takes on the genre either revived or reworked the conventions of the classics and at times amplified the classic standards. Even as the new payed homage and revitalized the old, it also critiqued it. It took the standard archetypes and made then laughable at times , made them over-exaggerations of themselves but largely it took what classic noir had begun and relaunched it's importance in society.
Neo-noir continued into the 80s and 90s, becoming grittier, more sexually charged and more acclaimed. Some directors who relaunched and changed the noir style for the new decade were Martin Scorsese, The Coen Brothers, David Cronenberg and David Lynch, who all mixed aspects of noir into different styles and genres. A perfect example of the new noir of the 90s was Pulp Fiction by Quentin Tarantino, the name alone describes where it's influence came from, the same place that influenced many noir films.
Noir has become popular in the 2000s also crossing into genres such as comic based movie even (such as with The Dark Knight), and sci-fi.
There are many noir staples such as the detective, the crime boss or the femme fatale. Common occurrences in noir films are murder (or some other form of crime), heists, false accusations of crimes, amnesia, and alienated characters. The setting is generally always urban and usually in a big city at night or during storms. Casinos, bars and nightclubs are also common locales in a noir. They generally always either question morality or include characters on the negative end of the morality spectrum. They usually include flashbacks, disrupted or obscure narrative, voiceover narration, and can be told in third-person but is generally first-person.
The lighting of noir films is very low and provides a lot of light/dark contrast and a lot of shadow. Many camera angles are common in noir such as the Dutch angle, low angle shots, wide angle shots, and skewed angle shots. Another noir staple is the use of mirrors, seeing characters in mirrors is common. On-site shooting is also common in noir and night-for-night shooting which means that night scenes are actually shot at night instead of in the daytime.
Noir is so popular that they even have video games in the style such as L.A. Noire or the noir section of Spiderman: Shattered Dimensions.
I would enjoy doing a noir style film some day in my hopeful career as a director, but we'll see if that all works out... anyway, I hope this was informative for you and check you later.
First off, I just played the game World of Goo and it's pretty fun, it's a physics based puzzle game where you have to build structures with goo balls. I may be behind on it but it'd would be a good app to get on an iPad or iPhone I'm sure. Another one is Plants vs. Zombies it may be lame but I really dig this game, you plant a bunch of plants that work like guns to kill invading zombies and then the last one, as everyone knows, is Angry Birds, which is also pretty fun. ANYWAY, there are some apps for you if you want games and shit...
Also, there's this youtube channel, dunno why, but I call it Shit Cats! You'll see... http://www.youtube.com/user/KimKwitter
Next in the line are my recommendations (as usual). For the film, I'm going to be super lame and let you see a side of me that I'm not proud of and say Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story (2007). That's right, this incredibly stupid comedy film that satirizes music documentaries like Walk The Line and The Doors. I thought the film was actually hilarious and great if you want a mindless, lowbrow sort of comedy. For the album today, I'll go with Surfer Rosa from Pixies. This is a great piece of alternative rock, it's great.
Okay, now onto the good stuff, film noir. If you don't know what a film noir is, it's generally a hollywood crime drama. Classic film noir lasted from the 1940s to the 1950s and had a black and white style that was similar to German expressionism. Film noir came out of the pulp crime fiction of the Depression. It is a very difficult genre to classify due to the fact that it could span and include many different subjects. One reason for the rise of the noir style in America was due to German expressionist film makers, like Fritz Lang, fleeing to America in the 30s and 40s to get away from Nazi control of Germany and bringing that style with them. Classic noir generally had a low budget and lacked a well known star. They were essentially B-movies that didn't always get the recognition they deserved until after they were released. Many of these films revolved around strong women, generally with questionable intent, which was uncommon at the time. The femme fatale was a common character archetype in noir, along with the brooding and hardened detective. Many of the popular and beloved noir films were A-list endeavors also, many of the noir directors that may have started off doing b-list movies eventually went onto direct A-list films also.
Noir is generally seen as an American film form, however, there are noir films from all over the world. France, Britain, Italy and Japan are just a few of the international entities that produced classic noir films.
The popularity of noir carried on into the 60s and became a style that is generally classified as neo-noir. Generally these new takes on the genre either revived or reworked the conventions of the classics and at times amplified the classic standards. Even as the new payed homage and revitalized the old, it also critiqued it. It took the standard archetypes and made then laughable at times , made them over-exaggerations of themselves but largely it took what classic noir had begun and relaunched it's importance in society.
Neo-noir continued into the 80s and 90s, becoming grittier, more sexually charged and more acclaimed. Some directors who relaunched and changed the noir style for the new decade were Martin Scorsese, The Coen Brothers, David Cronenberg and David Lynch, who all mixed aspects of noir into different styles and genres. A perfect example of the new noir of the 90s was Pulp Fiction by Quentin Tarantino, the name alone describes where it's influence came from, the same place that influenced many noir films.
Noir has become popular in the 2000s also crossing into genres such as comic based movie even (such as with The Dark Knight), and sci-fi.
There are many noir staples such as the detective, the crime boss or the femme fatale. Common occurrences in noir films are murder (or some other form of crime), heists, false accusations of crimes, amnesia, and alienated characters. The setting is generally always urban and usually in a big city at night or during storms. Casinos, bars and nightclubs are also common locales in a noir. They generally always either question morality or include characters on the negative end of the morality spectrum. They usually include flashbacks, disrupted or obscure narrative, voiceover narration, and can be told in third-person but is generally first-person.
The lighting of noir films is very low and provides a lot of light/dark contrast and a lot of shadow. Many camera angles are common in noir such as the Dutch angle, low angle shots, wide angle shots, and skewed angle shots. Another noir staple is the use of mirrors, seeing characters in mirrors is common. On-site shooting is also common in noir and night-for-night shooting which means that night scenes are actually shot at night instead of in the daytime.
Noir is so popular that they even have video games in the style such as L.A. Noire or the noir section of Spiderman: Shattered Dimensions.
I would enjoy doing a noir style film some day in my hopeful career as a director, but we'll see if that all works out... anyway, I hope this was informative for you and check you later.
Friday, July 29, 2011
The Forty-second Flail-- AWESOME!
So, this is gonna be a shorty... BUUUUTTT, The Hobbit has photos! AND I'm excited like a motherfucker! If you wanna see The Hobbit like I wanna see The Hobbit, you'll be psyched. ANYWAY, I know I've mentioned it, but it's awesome that Martin Freeman is playing Bilbo... on to the photos, most are on IMDb.
Anyway, there we go, a ton of photos and there are more here... http://www.imdb.com/media/rm107462400/tt0903624
Recommendations now...
Album is Oh, Inverted World by The Shins and my film is Moon (2009) which is about an astronaut, played by Sam Rockwell, who is stationed on the Moon, waiting to go home and going crazy, it's a pretty good film.
Anyway, Happy Birthday to anyone who has a birthday today and check you later.
Anyway, there we go, a ton of photos and there are more here... http://www.imdb.com/media/rm107462400/tt0903624
Recommendations now...
Album is Oh, Inverted World by The Shins and my film is Moon (2009) which is about an astronaut, played by Sam Rockwell, who is stationed on the Moon, waiting to go home and going crazy, it's a pretty good film.
Anyway, Happy Birthday to anyone who has a birthday today and check you later.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
The Forty-first Burglary-- Awful People + Dynamite
Okay, so, I'm not going to go on through this whole thing about one topic, but I have something to bitch about, what is that you may ask? well... THAT is child beauty pageants, yeah, child beauty pageants. What does this have to do with film? nothing really, but there IS a TV show called Toddlers & Tiaras, so it's close maybe, but anyway, I think this is pretty sick. It's one thing if the girls WANT to do it, however, there should be a line. Too many pageant mothers tear down these little girls for not being perfect, they keep them away from other things the girls would prefer doing and dress them up to look much older than they should. It's very wrong when the girls DON'T want to do it and the mothers force them to to live out their lives through their daughters. On top of all of this, the kids don't even get the money a lot of the time. They are exploited and the parents can't even put the money in a college fund or something? no! they either send it on themselves or pump it into another pageant! This is wrong and fuck the people that do this, one of the things I can't stand.
ANYWAY, I'm done with my rant... on to recommendations! My movie this time is Kick Ass, the film based on the comic about a kid who ends up dressing up like a superhero, getting his ass kicked repeatedly and gets in WAY over his head. The film isn't the greatest but it is very entertaining, and who doesn't like watching unbelievable amounts of violence and a foulmouthed little girl kill people? That just makes for a good film. My album is oOoOO EP from oOoOO, I'm not sure how to describe it but it's got everything from electronica to hip hop. It's pretty awesome.
Now, back to things that are just awful, I'm going to talk about some film makers whose movies I can't stand, Jared and Jerusha Hess. If you don't know who these people are, a mormon couple that worked on films like Napoleon Dynamite. Jerusha being from Omaha, Nebraska and Jared from Preston, Idaho. Anyway, I find the films they make quite dull and their sense of humor awful, but let's get into some of these horrid films shall we?
First is Napoleon Dynamite (2004) which is about a very boring kid who lives out in west butt fuck nowhere, and goes through the unimportant task of getting his equally boring friend elected as student body president. This film is so dull, has almost no sense of humor, not even a clever or dry one, and is, overall, just a horrible movie. What doesn't help it's case is the fact that every Junior High Schooler quoted every fucking line from the film twenty thousand times (just like the way everyone over quoted 300 to death). More or less Jon Heder does an amazing job of being dull and unfunny and everyone else in the film also does a great job at their horrible form of deadpan. The classic ending dance scene is fairly entertaining but does not make up for this flopping, dying, boring fart of a movie. I'm not sure why this film has such a huge cult following. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0374900/synopsis
Next up for the couple is Nacho Libre (2006) which they co-wrote with Mike White. This film is a mild improvement over Napoleon Dynamite. Jack Black plays a fairly entertaining Catholic priest who wants to be a masked wrestler. It has more of that dull deadpan sense of humor that the last film had except this time is brought with the spastic flair that Jack Black possesses and his a bit more of Mike White's humor (which isn't necessarily better). The film is a blatant children's film and has none of the slight edge that the last had, but is a tad more funny, still not good though. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457510/synopsis
The last film the couple have to date didn't even make theaters, it was called Gentlemen Broncos (2009) and is about a boy who writes a sci-fi book that gest stolen by a famous author played by Jemaine Clement (from Flight of the Conchords). I haven't seen the film and it appears to be a bit better than the last two, but if these film makers prove anything it's that this film will probably end up being as dull and lacking humor as the last ones. I have very little hope for this film, even if it DOES have Jemaine Clement and Sam Rockwell, both of whom I enjoy. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1161418/plotsummary
Anyway, those are some things I dislike. There are more, trust me, but that's what I have to talk about now...
To send you off well, here's an odd video... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEJu5eoAk3U&feature=related
Have fun y'all!
ANYWAY, I'm done with my rant... on to recommendations! My movie this time is Kick Ass, the film based on the comic about a kid who ends up dressing up like a superhero, getting his ass kicked repeatedly and gets in WAY over his head. The film isn't the greatest but it is very entertaining, and who doesn't like watching unbelievable amounts of violence and a foulmouthed little girl kill people? That just makes for a good film. My album is oOoOO EP from oOoOO, I'm not sure how to describe it but it's got everything from electronica to hip hop. It's pretty awesome.
Now, back to things that are just awful, I'm going to talk about some film makers whose movies I can't stand, Jared and Jerusha Hess. If you don't know who these people are, a mormon couple that worked on films like Napoleon Dynamite. Jerusha being from Omaha, Nebraska and Jared from Preston, Idaho. Anyway, I find the films they make quite dull and their sense of humor awful, but let's get into some of these horrid films shall we?
First is Napoleon Dynamite (2004) which is about a very boring kid who lives out in west butt fuck nowhere, and goes through the unimportant task of getting his equally boring friend elected as student body president. This film is so dull, has almost no sense of humor, not even a clever or dry one, and is, overall, just a horrible movie. What doesn't help it's case is the fact that every Junior High Schooler quoted every fucking line from the film twenty thousand times (just like the way everyone over quoted 300 to death). More or less Jon Heder does an amazing job of being dull and unfunny and everyone else in the film also does a great job at their horrible form of deadpan. The classic ending dance scene is fairly entertaining but does not make up for this flopping, dying, boring fart of a movie. I'm not sure why this film has such a huge cult following. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0374900/synopsis
Next up for the couple is Nacho Libre (2006) which they co-wrote with Mike White. This film is a mild improvement over Napoleon Dynamite. Jack Black plays a fairly entertaining Catholic priest who wants to be a masked wrestler. It has more of that dull deadpan sense of humor that the last film had except this time is brought with the spastic flair that Jack Black possesses and his a bit more of Mike White's humor (which isn't necessarily better). The film is a blatant children's film and has none of the slight edge that the last had, but is a tad more funny, still not good though. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457510/synopsis
The last film the couple have to date didn't even make theaters, it was called Gentlemen Broncos (2009) and is about a boy who writes a sci-fi book that gest stolen by a famous author played by Jemaine Clement (from Flight of the Conchords). I haven't seen the film and it appears to be a bit better than the last two, but if these film makers prove anything it's that this film will probably end up being as dull and lacking humor as the last ones. I have very little hope for this film, even if it DOES have Jemaine Clement and Sam Rockwell, both of whom I enjoy. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1161418/plotsummary
Anyway, those are some things I dislike. There are more, trust me, but that's what I have to talk about now...
To send you off well, here's an odd video... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEJu5eoAk3U&feature=related
Have fun y'all!
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
The Fortieth Drum-- The Ocean is 6 Miles Deep: A Review
Recently, my wonderful girlfriend and I went to see the film Submarine. Which is a film about a young boy who struggles between his love of his girlfriend and his desire to prevent his parents from splitting. This eventually leads to the choice he must make of attempting to save his parents marriage or being there for the girl he loves. Now... You may be thinking, "oh god, this sounds like such a fucking lame and generic love story, this is just gonna be terrible!". Well my fine feathered friends, you are WRONG!! The movie is a wonderful piece of indie cinema and a lot more than just a lame recycled story. Submarine is executed very cleverly from it's dry, quirky, dead pan humor to it's odd and intriguing characters.
Oliver Tate alone is a wonderful character full of odd humor, he is the center of a cast of brilliant and unique characters that make up the Wales of Submarine. For starters, Oliver is 15 and much too concerned in the sensual "goings on" of his parents because he is so consumed by their possible splitting, next, he's equally concerned about his own loss of virginity. He eventually wants to become a good boyfriend with the girl he falls in love with but ultimately abandons this for his concern for his parents. In spite of this fact, he also refers to his relationship in terms of the sex (example, him saying that he might as well tell his girlfriend things because they had sex). Another character in the film is Jordana, who is Oliver's eventual girlfriend. She begins the film as a misunderstood and slightly sadistic outcast that has no intention of falling for Oliver. Their relationship starts as a revenge plot but, upon the sweet things Oliver does, ends up deepening to mutual admiration. Jordana even abandons her more questionable tendencies (such as burning Oliver's leg hair off) for a more sincere need to be comforted over her family problems. Another quirky character in the film is Oliver's father, who is a severely depressed marine biologist. Oliver's father adds a very very dry level of humor to the film (and the repeated line that the ocean is 6 feet deep), his depression comes off very humorous and you can't help but sympathize and overlook his many flaws. Oliver's mother is another character, a woman who appears to relish her previous life, she eventually befriends one of her ex-lovers. The final odd character is Oliver's Mom's ex-lover Graham (who Oliver repeatedly calls a "ninja" and a "mystic"). Graham is a motivational speaker who talks about light and color and has many many odd habits (his character is similar to Patrick Swayze's character in Donnie Darko). Overall the film had a great and unique cast of characters that filled the odd world.
The film is very genuine, very sincere and on top of all of the absurdity and odd humor, it has a lot of heart. It's great coming-of-age story with the twist of Oliver attempting to save his parent's marriage. Really the film is delightful and one of the better movies I've seen recently, I think you should go see it if you like how it sounds.
Now for my recommendations, first off, for my album I'm choosing Vision Creation Newsun by Boredoms, it's a great piece of Japanese noise music that branches into absent, drone, minimalism and tribal drumming. On top of that, all of the song titles are symbols (which I personally enjoy). For my film recommendation, I'll say Persepolis, it's an animated film about a young Iraqi girl who gets sent to France due to the civil war in Iraq, and the struggles she faces fitting in, don't let the plot fool you, it's a great film.
Lastly, a bit of personl stuff. I mentioned how I was going to go to Lincoln for college, well due to budget restraints, that's not going to happen now. I won't be attending college for a whole year now and when I do finally go back, I may end up at Iowa. Anyway, that's a little about where I am right now, have a good one.
Oliver Tate alone is a wonderful character full of odd humor, he is the center of a cast of brilliant and unique characters that make up the Wales of Submarine. For starters, Oliver is 15 and much too concerned in the sensual "goings on" of his parents because he is so consumed by their possible splitting, next, he's equally concerned about his own loss of virginity. He eventually wants to become a good boyfriend with the girl he falls in love with but ultimately abandons this for his concern for his parents. In spite of this fact, he also refers to his relationship in terms of the sex (example, him saying that he might as well tell his girlfriend things because they had sex). Another character in the film is Jordana, who is Oliver's eventual girlfriend. She begins the film as a misunderstood and slightly sadistic outcast that has no intention of falling for Oliver. Their relationship starts as a revenge plot but, upon the sweet things Oliver does, ends up deepening to mutual admiration. Jordana even abandons her more questionable tendencies (such as burning Oliver's leg hair off) for a more sincere need to be comforted over her family problems. Another quirky character in the film is Oliver's father, who is a severely depressed marine biologist. Oliver's father adds a very very dry level of humor to the film (and the repeated line that the ocean is 6 feet deep), his depression comes off very humorous and you can't help but sympathize and overlook his many flaws. Oliver's mother is another character, a woman who appears to relish her previous life, she eventually befriends one of her ex-lovers. The final odd character is Oliver's Mom's ex-lover Graham (who Oliver repeatedly calls a "ninja" and a "mystic"). Graham is a motivational speaker who talks about light and color and has many many odd habits (his character is similar to Patrick Swayze's character in Donnie Darko). Overall the film had a great and unique cast of characters that filled the odd world.
The film is very genuine, very sincere and on top of all of the absurdity and odd humor, it has a lot of heart. It's great coming-of-age story with the twist of Oliver attempting to save his parent's marriage. Really the film is delightful and one of the better movies I've seen recently, I think you should go see it if you like how it sounds.
Now for my recommendations, first off, for my album I'm choosing Vision Creation Newsun by Boredoms, it's a great piece of Japanese noise music that branches into absent, drone, minimalism and tribal drumming. On top of that, all of the song titles are symbols (which I personally enjoy). For my film recommendation, I'll say Persepolis, it's an animated film about a young Iraqi girl who gets sent to France due to the civil war in Iraq, and the struggles she faces fitting in, don't let the plot fool you, it's a great film.
Lastly, a bit of personl stuff. I mentioned how I was going to go to Lincoln for college, well due to budget restraints, that's not going to happen now. I won't be attending college for a whole year now and when I do finally go back, I may end up at Iowa. Anyway, that's a little about where I am right now, have a good one.
Thursday, July 21, 2011
The Thirty-ninth Cabbage-- Lock, Stock and Barrel
Here Harry Potter fans! This is fun!
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harry-potter-films-according-to-someone-who-never-saw-them/
Here weed fans! This is fun!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWuHuqWauRU&feature=related
Okay, so this blog post, this blog post, this blog post!! I dunno what the fucking shitty ass cunt balls I'm going to talk about but let me say that I have become (as everyone has appeared to) quite enthralled by OFWGKTA. If you don't know what that is, it's a demented hip hop collective that stands for Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All. They include new underground rap artists like Tyler The Creator, MellowHype, Earl Sweatshirt and Frank Ocean. I'm not sure why they intrigue me so much, a lot of their lyrics are just horrible and offensive, but there's humor in it and maybe that's what I like, taking disturbed and demented things to a comedic level. Anyway, check it out, you might like it, I'll link some videos...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSbZidsgMfw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFNaFeIm4bU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fk68dCUQjzE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWMOEVdXR2o
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78_loMbmKJ8
Now on to some stuff!
Alright, next, let's talk about film, but not film as in the art form of movie making but film as in film stock or the literal series of pictures that makes up a movie (before everything went digital). Hope you're excited! Good old fashioned film stock is made of celluloid, which is a type of plastic, and this is more permanent than the thin paper film that movies started out on. Early on all film stock was also nitrate based and highly highly flammable and the fires were incredibly hard to put out. As you all know films started as black and white endeavors with no sound, eventually sound was added and then eventually color was added also. The first attempt with color film was Kinemacolor which lasted from 1908 to 1914 and was achieved by showing a black and white film behind alternating red and cyan frames. Next was Technicolor (which is much more well known) and was used from 1916 to 1952, this was a lot more complex and allowed for much more color and actually evolved four times over it's existence.
There are different formats for film stock, 8mm, this film stock is 8mm wide and there are two versions of it, standard 8mm and Super 8. Standard 8 came out during the Great Depression and was produced as a cheaper way of making home movies (Kodak stopped producing standard 8 film in the early 1990s). Super 8 was released in 1965 and became popular with amateur film makers because it was easier to use and had better picture quality than standard 8.
There was a 9.5mm film that was primarily meant to be cheap for home users and a way to recreate popular films for home viewing, however, it was damaged easily due to it's perforation and not very popular.
One of the most popular formats was 16mm. It was also was intended for home use and was also used to rent popular movies for home viewing. However, some movies were filmed on 16mm and a lot of TV shows and educational videos were shot in this format. Just like 8mm film, 16mm came in a larger form called Super 16, it only had one sided perforation in order to have a wider screen area.
For a very very short time there was a 28mm format, however, it didn't last.
35mm film stock was the most common format for motion pictures. There are many many forms of 35mm stock including a 3 perforation form and Super 35. 35mm stock is still used today as the most common format for major motion pictures.
The last common gauge for film stock is 70mm/65mm. Now, the reason there are two here is that the films are filmed on 65 and then printed on 70 to be projected. The 70mm print is for wide, high resolution films and has a very wide aspect ratio, it's usually used for grandiose and intense films that would look good in an IMAX or anything with a large aspect ratio (a lot of Spiderman 2 was shot in this format).
IMAX is another format and it's just 70mm film on it's side to create an extremely wide view.
The rest is all digital and shit and I don't wish to get into that (even though it's the way of the future), but maybe I will at a later date.
Now that you have all of that information, I'm going to switch gears.
So, as I've mentioned before, I am Winter Chairs. http://www.mediafire.com/?n9zdg99ajea4ni5
I have also finished my LP called Meet The Cactus, so if you would be interested in that let me know or give me an email and I can give it to you, it comes with a coloring book! (all pages being hand drawn).
Here's a preview from the coloring book...
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harry-potter-films-according-to-someone-who-never-saw-them/
Here weed fans! This is fun!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWuHuqWauRU&feature=related
Okay, so this blog post, this blog post, this blog post!! I dunno what the fucking shitty ass cunt balls I'm going to talk about but let me say that I have become (as everyone has appeared to) quite enthralled by OFWGKTA. If you don't know what that is, it's a demented hip hop collective that stands for Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All. They include new underground rap artists like Tyler The Creator, MellowHype, Earl Sweatshirt and Frank Ocean. I'm not sure why they intrigue me so much, a lot of their lyrics are just horrible and offensive, but there's humor in it and maybe that's what I like, taking disturbed and demented things to a comedic level. Anyway, check it out, you might like it, I'll link some videos...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSbZidsgMfw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFNaFeIm4bU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fk68dCUQjzE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWMOEVdXR2o
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78_loMbmKJ8
Now on to some stuff!
Alright, next, let's talk about film, but not film as in the art form of movie making but film as in film stock or the literal series of pictures that makes up a movie (before everything went digital). Hope you're excited! Good old fashioned film stock is made of celluloid, which is a type of plastic, and this is more permanent than the thin paper film that movies started out on. Early on all film stock was also nitrate based and highly highly flammable and the fires were incredibly hard to put out. As you all know films started as black and white endeavors with no sound, eventually sound was added and then eventually color was added also. The first attempt with color film was Kinemacolor which lasted from 1908 to 1914 and was achieved by showing a black and white film behind alternating red and cyan frames. Next was Technicolor (which is much more well known) and was used from 1916 to 1952, this was a lot more complex and allowed for much more color and actually evolved four times over it's existence.
There are different formats for film stock, 8mm, this film stock is 8mm wide and there are two versions of it, standard 8mm and Super 8. Standard 8 came out during the Great Depression and was produced as a cheaper way of making home movies (Kodak stopped producing standard 8 film in the early 1990s). Super 8 was released in 1965 and became popular with amateur film makers because it was easier to use and had better picture quality than standard 8.
There was a 9.5mm film that was primarily meant to be cheap for home users and a way to recreate popular films for home viewing, however, it was damaged easily due to it's perforation and not very popular.
One of the most popular formats was 16mm. It was also was intended for home use and was also used to rent popular movies for home viewing. However, some movies were filmed on 16mm and a lot of TV shows and educational videos were shot in this format. Just like 8mm film, 16mm came in a larger form called Super 16, it only had one sided perforation in order to have a wider screen area.
For a very very short time there was a 28mm format, however, it didn't last.
35mm film stock was the most common format for motion pictures. There are many many forms of 35mm stock including a 3 perforation form and Super 35. 35mm stock is still used today as the most common format for major motion pictures.
The last common gauge for film stock is 70mm/65mm. Now, the reason there are two here is that the films are filmed on 65 and then printed on 70 to be projected. The 70mm print is for wide, high resolution films and has a very wide aspect ratio, it's usually used for grandiose and intense films that would look good in an IMAX or anything with a large aspect ratio (a lot of Spiderman 2 was shot in this format).
IMAX is another format and it's just 70mm film on it's side to create an extremely wide view.
The rest is all digital and shit and I don't wish to get into that (even though it's the way of the future), but maybe I will at a later date.
Now that you have all of that information, I'm going to switch gears.
So, as I've mentioned before, I am Winter Chairs. http://www.mediafire.com/?n9zdg99ajea4ni5
I have also finished my LP called Meet The Cactus, so if you would be interested in that let me know or give me an email and I can give it to you, it comes with a coloring book! (all pages being hand drawn).
Here's a preview from the coloring book...
Real quick, my recommendations for tonight are as follows... Movie, it's Repo! The Genetic Opera, it's a musical rock opera about a company that takes over the world and loans out organs to people but also repossesses them if the people can't make their payments. For my album, I'm going to go with... Mines by Menomena, it's such a great album and a great continuation of Menomena's series of albums.
Anyway, I shall bid you adieu, Tah!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
The Thirty-eighth House-- So People Like This...: A Review
Hello all, it's been a very questionable time for cinema recently in my opinion. You have a new super hero movie coming out every week and the biggest redeeming piece of cinema coming out soon is the new Harry Potter flick, dismal indeed. What do we having coming out of the art scene though? What kind of groundbreaking film will save us from all of this? According to Cannes, it's The Tree of Life, which won the Palme d'Or this year. Well I saw this film and let me ask this question, the art scene likes this?
The answer to that question is, of course the art scene likes this, the art scene likes everything that isn't popular, but let me explain how I see/feel about the movie real quick.
Let me start by saying that this film was visually breathtaking, there were a ton of awesome shots, artistic camera angles and sweet ass visuals, AND I think there may have been a plot in there somewhere! (but I'm not sure). Really, this is a director/DP's wet dream, it's got incredible shots and just amazing scenes. On the other hand, it's a storyteller's nightmare. There is almost no coherent plot in this film. The first half of the film hints to a possible story line of a family dealing with the death of a child, however, it quickly falls to images from a Planet Earth documentary, an unexplained and unnecessary tangent about dinosaurs (which are very poorly animated) and a load of space photography with extremely cryptic voice overs. It then goes into the story of three young boys in the 50s or 60s and their demanding father. This COULD have been a real plot, however, instead of really developing into one, it focuses more on the abstract depiction of the eldest son's inner turmoil and many shots of him sneaking around looking devious. After all of this semi-story it skips to Sean Penn as one of the sons grown up and shows him walking around an unexplained desert surrounded by other people from his life.
The space shots were amazing and beautiful, however, I must say, if I wanted to see this I would watch a documentary. The whole film could have been decent if the plot were more coherent. It had a good idea and a good story but it focused way too much on the artistic and not enough on making the movie something watchable. By the end you're wondering how much longer before it's over.
Was the film horrible? No, is it worth watching? I my opinion no, but do what you like, if it sounds like your kind of thing, go for it. I guess I'm just not artsy enough for this film.
ANYWAY, now that I've said what I've said...
My recommendations are these... Freaks (1932) by Tod Browning is my movie recommendation. I may have mentioned this film before but I love it, it's charming, it's adorable, it's disturbing. It's the story of handicapped people being mistreated in a traveling circus and eventually exacting their revenge. It's a great film. My album recommendation is Organix by The Roots. This is the first album from the Philadelphia hip hop band and is a hidden gem. It's not the most well known album from the band, but it's really good still.
There you go!
The answer to that question is, of course the art scene likes this, the art scene likes everything that isn't popular, but let me explain how I see/feel about the movie real quick.
Let me start by saying that this film was visually breathtaking, there were a ton of awesome shots, artistic camera angles and sweet ass visuals, AND I think there may have been a plot in there somewhere! (but I'm not sure). Really, this is a director/DP's wet dream, it's got incredible shots and just amazing scenes. On the other hand, it's a storyteller's nightmare. There is almost no coherent plot in this film. The first half of the film hints to a possible story line of a family dealing with the death of a child, however, it quickly falls to images from a Planet Earth documentary, an unexplained and unnecessary tangent about dinosaurs (which are very poorly animated) and a load of space photography with extremely cryptic voice overs. It then goes into the story of three young boys in the 50s or 60s and their demanding father. This COULD have been a real plot, however, instead of really developing into one, it focuses more on the abstract depiction of the eldest son's inner turmoil and many shots of him sneaking around looking devious. After all of this semi-story it skips to Sean Penn as one of the sons grown up and shows him walking around an unexplained desert surrounded by other people from his life.
The space shots were amazing and beautiful, however, I must say, if I wanted to see this I would watch a documentary. The whole film could have been decent if the plot were more coherent. It had a good idea and a good story but it focused way too much on the artistic and not enough on making the movie something watchable. By the end you're wondering how much longer before it's over.
Was the film horrible? No, is it worth watching? I my opinion no, but do what you like, if it sounds like your kind of thing, go for it. I guess I'm just not artsy enough for this film.
ANYWAY, now that I've said what I've said...
My recommendations are these... Freaks (1932) by Tod Browning is my movie recommendation. I may have mentioned this film before but I love it, it's charming, it's adorable, it's disturbing. It's the story of handicapped people being mistreated in a traveling circus and eventually exacting their revenge. It's a great film. My album recommendation is Organix by The Roots. This is the first album from the Philadelphia hip hop band and is a hidden gem. It's not the most well known album from the band, but it's really good still.
There you go!
Sunday, July 10, 2011
The Thirty-seventh Lamp-- That's Just Horrible: A Review
Hello one and all, feeling like it's been a slow point recently for movies? Wondering what to go see in these months of superheroes, pirates, and giant robots? Well you are not alone! I also am discouraged with the cinematic output as of late, however, there is one film that I have seen recently that has reached my level of acceptable and that is Horrible Bosses.
This film tells the story of three men who work for very bad people, their ultimate goal to free themselves from their bastard bosses is to get them killed. The catch in this wonderful tale is the fact that they have to kill EACH OTHERS bosses, which leads to all of the zany antics in the film.
Now that you have the gist, on to the rest. I actually thought that this movie was funny, it is actually packed with laughs, some of them lowbrow and some not, but ultimately it's an enjoyable film. Some of the repeated jokes get old, such as Jamie Foxx's character whose name is "Motherfucker" Jones, a joke that they take advantage of but attempting to fit it everywhere in the dialogue. Another example of lowbrow humor in the film is a particular sight gag where Jennifer Aniston's character is shown in a bra and panties eating three phallic foods in succession. What saves this scene is the fast and clever dialogue between the three leads.
What makes this film redeemable and keeps it from being just another horrible comedy like so many these days is the talent of the three male leads, Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis, and Charlie Day. All three are very good at what they do, but in very different ways. Their characters compliment one another by having the characteristics the others lack but sharing the same smart and quick sarcasm that makes the film acceptable. Charlie Day especially stands out and is one of the reasons I considered seeing this film. I love his role on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and in this film he is able to pull off the same outrageous but clever character as he does there. He adds a large majority of the blatant humor to the film such as Zach Galifianakis in The Hangover. The other two are more serious, with Jason Bateman taking the role of the sarcastic straight man, a role that is excellently executed and adds quite a lot of comedy to the film, and Jason Sudeikis as the ladies man who lacks sense.
The bosses, on the other hand, aren't as enjoyable. Kevin Spacey is great as usual but really only plays the role of a psychotic villain, Collin Farrell's character is totally unimportant other than to tie the story together and offer a few lame jokes and Jennifer Aniston doesn't totally fit into the story and is only used to add sex jokes and inappropriate lines.
Overall the movie could have been as awful as the average modern comedy, but due to the talents of the leads and the clever writing in this film, it ends up being an enjoyable movie, however, the ending kinda kills it, but at least it ends happy. I'd would say to go see it, I'm giving this film a 7.5 out of 10.
For my recommendations, I'm going to go with The Departed by Martin Scorsese. This film tells the story of a cop infiltrating the mob while a member of the mob is infiltrating the police force. The movie is excellent like a lot of Scorsese films and has an ending that is fairly unexpected. For my album recommendation, I'll say Headless Heroes of The Apocalypse by Eugene McDaniels who is a singer songwriter from the '60s and '70s who wrote about social issues and was actually blacklisted by the Vice President at the time, Spiro Agnew.
So there it is, have fun with it, bye bye for now!
This film tells the story of three men who work for very bad people, their ultimate goal to free themselves from their bastard bosses is to get them killed. The catch in this wonderful tale is the fact that they have to kill EACH OTHERS bosses, which leads to all of the zany antics in the film.
Now that you have the gist, on to the rest. I actually thought that this movie was funny, it is actually packed with laughs, some of them lowbrow and some not, but ultimately it's an enjoyable film. Some of the repeated jokes get old, such as Jamie Foxx's character whose name is "Motherfucker" Jones, a joke that they take advantage of but attempting to fit it everywhere in the dialogue. Another example of lowbrow humor in the film is a particular sight gag where Jennifer Aniston's character is shown in a bra and panties eating three phallic foods in succession. What saves this scene is the fast and clever dialogue between the three leads.
What makes this film redeemable and keeps it from being just another horrible comedy like so many these days is the talent of the three male leads, Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis, and Charlie Day. All three are very good at what they do, but in very different ways. Their characters compliment one another by having the characteristics the others lack but sharing the same smart and quick sarcasm that makes the film acceptable. Charlie Day especially stands out and is one of the reasons I considered seeing this film. I love his role on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and in this film he is able to pull off the same outrageous but clever character as he does there. He adds a large majority of the blatant humor to the film such as Zach Galifianakis in The Hangover. The other two are more serious, with Jason Bateman taking the role of the sarcastic straight man, a role that is excellently executed and adds quite a lot of comedy to the film, and Jason Sudeikis as the ladies man who lacks sense.
The bosses, on the other hand, aren't as enjoyable. Kevin Spacey is great as usual but really only plays the role of a psychotic villain, Collin Farrell's character is totally unimportant other than to tie the story together and offer a few lame jokes and Jennifer Aniston doesn't totally fit into the story and is only used to add sex jokes and inappropriate lines.
Overall the movie could have been as awful as the average modern comedy, but due to the talents of the leads and the clever writing in this film, it ends up being an enjoyable movie, however, the ending kinda kills it, but at least it ends happy. I'd would say to go see it, I'm giving this film a 7.5 out of 10.
For my recommendations, I'm going to go with The Departed by Martin Scorsese. This film tells the story of a cop infiltrating the mob while a member of the mob is infiltrating the police force. The movie is excellent like a lot of Scorsese films and has an ending that is fairly unexpected. For my album recommendation, I'll say Headless Heroes of The Apocalypse by Eugene McDaniels who is a singer songwriter from the '60s and '70s who wrote about social issues and was actually blacklisted by the Vice President at the time, Spiro Agnew.
So there it is, have fun with it, bye bye for now!
Sunday, July 3, 2011
The Thirty-sixth March-- Cats... The Shit!
Okay, don't hate me but this post will not be about movies, instead it will be about this... you're welcome...
SEE THIS CAT? HIS NAME IS GIZZY...
SEE THIS CAT? HIS NAME IS GIZZY...
HE'S PRETTY MUCH THE SHIT! LOOK AT HIM! HE'S A FUCKING CAT ISN'T HE? FUCK YEAH HE IS! BEING A BLACK BEAUTIFUL CAT SITTING ALL REGAL AND SHIT! HE'S FUCKING PLAYFUL AS A MOTHERFUCKER TOO! HE WOULD KICK YOUR CAT'S ASS AND THEN BAT AT IT LIKE IT WAS A FUCKING TOY MOUSE ON A STRING! HE'S THE FUCKING MAN AND HE'S ON A FUCKING CAT TREE SO SHIT YEAH!!
AND WHAT ABOUT THIS BEAUTY, SEE HER? HER FUCKING KICK ASS NAME IS TINKERBELL (THAT'S RIGHT, FUCKING TINKER-FUCKING-BELL!)
YOU THINK SHE TAKES SHIT JUST BECAUSE HER NAME IS TINKERBELL? YOU'RE FUCKING WRONG! SHE'S A FUCKING HARD ASS WHO WILL KICK ANY MOTHERFUCKER IN THE BALLS AND PURR IN JOY! SHE LIKES LOOKING OUT FUCKING WINDOWS TOO, I THINK IT'S TO FIND MOTHERFUCKERS TO EAT ALIVE BECAUSE SHE'S A FUCKING AWESOME CAT! FUCK! LOOK AT HER FUCKING ADORABLE FACE AND TREMBLE IN TERROR!
AND WHAT ABOUT THIS FLUFFY PILE OF FUCKING AWESOME? HIS NAME IS KINO!
LOOK AT HIM LURKING IN THE SHADOWS AND SHIT! HE'LL POUNCE ON A MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU'LL LOVE IT! HE'S A TOTAL BADASS, IT DOESN'T MATTER IF HE'S SICK OR WELL, HE'LL STILL KICK ASS AND TAKE NAMES! ISN'T HE THE SHIT? LOOK AT HIM!! IF YOU SEE HIM COMING DOWN YOUR STREET YOU BETTER LOCK UP YOUR DAUGHTERS AND WIVES BECAUSE HE'S MORE OR LESS WAY MORE FUCKING AWESOME THAN YOU!! SHIT!
YOU WISH YOU HAD THESE FUCKING CATS!!
ahem...
Anyway, there's a post on cats, they belong to my girlfriend (who is awesome!) and I
So, not to jip you completely, I'll still do recommendations this post (please forgive my stupidity)... for my album recommendation, it's going to be Lola Verses Powerman and The Moneygoround: Part 1 by The Kinks, it's a classic piece of British invasion and one of my favorite Kinks albums and then for my movie recommendation, I'm going to go with The Naked City, directed by Jules Dassin, it's a nice little piece of noir crime drama and it's in The Criterion Collection, so go listen/watch that stuff and have a good Fourth tomorrow! See you guys later (if this post didn't lose the, like, 5 readers I have!).
Also... I have a youtube account now as Winter Chairs so if there are any stupid video I do, I'll try to put them up (I'll only broadcast it on here if they're worthwhile), but I'll also favorite some of the old early 1900s short silent films I watch so you can see them on there too!
Saturday, July 2, 2011
The Thirty-fifth Shit-- Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots (In Disguise)
So... The third Transformers film came out recently and we all know what THAT means!! More whiny Shia LeBeouf, more overly sexualized 20 something girl (only this time it's NOT Megan Fox!), more explosions, more lame jokes and more giant robot beat downs! The most important thing though, is more of the big budget, blockbuster, explosion, CGI filled action film directing of Michael Bay, the director that gave us such gems as Armageddon, Bad Boys, Mystery Men and Coyote Ugly (right?).
ANYWAY, we're onto the third in the epic robot trilogy, this one so wonderfully titled Transformers: Dark of The Moon. NOW, I have not seen this film, I do not plan on seeing this film (unless I see it on DVD somewhere down the line), but I can make assumptions as to how it is (and how bad it is), based on the other Transformer films.
Now, I'm going to do a run down of the Transformers films... first in the trilogy is the 2007 film Transformers. If you were like me, when you heard about this project way back in '07, you were thinking, "what the fuck? they're making a film about Transformers? like those little toys I played with when I was little?" (because you probably didn't see the cartoon unless you were either in your 30s or in your 10s after the film came out). Even though it sounded weird though, you thought you'd check it out... and you did. The other thing you probably questioned upon hearing it was Shia LaBeouf's role in the movie (considering that before this film made him an action star, he was a kid on the Disney channel). Now that I have all of those thoughts out of the way, on to the film. Transformers was one of those movies that was actually very interesting. The CGI didn't make you want to completely vomit, the action was well done and it's Transformers, who DIDN'T wanna see gigantic transforming space robots fight one another? You could even overlook some of the bad shit, like the horrible Bush spoof used for comedy that will be outdated in a year, the really lame sex jokes, the fact that a lot of the transformers had giant metal bug faces, the overuse of Megan Fox conveniently bending over in barely any clothes, how purely retarded and oblivious the parents were and Shia LaBeouf's bitchy whiny bitch-ness. You could probably overlook how lame the term "AllSpark" was and how many times they felt they needed to say it. This movie had it's redeeming qualities, it had a pretty cool fight scene to finish it off and it was actually decently executed. However, it has major major flaws that just make it awful. Other than the ones that you overlooked were, the relentless product placement (eBay, Mountain Dew, GM, fucking everything was plugged in this film!), another thing is the lame acting (John Turturro played a very annoying character, Shia LaBeouf played and even more annoying character and Megan Fox didn't really have to act, just look like Angelina Jolie and be exploited). The movie was sabotaged with shit to sell tickets, when in all actuality just having a bunch of giant fucking robots would probably have been enough to sell tickets (dumb asses!), I would say if you're gonna watch a Transformers movie, make it the first one, otherwise don't bother.
The second film in this beautiful series of explosion filled films is titled Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen (2009). In this film the Deceptacons revive their dead leader Megatron and try to get some shit and destroy the Earth and Sun and some shit, I don't care. THIS time though, they're following some other long lost evil robot called The Fallen! (ooooh, aaaaaah). This film has a lot of what the last film had girls being over-sexualized, explosions, robots, fighting, the military, yadda yadda, except THIS one had parts in Egypt and a robot broke out of the pyramids! (ooooh, aaaaah). I dunno, really this film was a lot worse than the first one (I know, crazy right?). It's a sequel and didn't really need to be made. It had less impressive CGI, less of a decent plot but the same lame jokes (this time they weren't as sexual though). In fact, this film was such a pathetic sequel I only saw it once and don't really remember it, I dunno, I don't have much to say except it made me angry that a Transformer could turn into a person, I'm pretty sure they could never copy organic things (AND she had a giant snake knife come out of her ass). I dunno, I wouldn't watch it but you'll do what you want.
And now the third one Transformers: Dark of The Moon (2011). I'll say this if it's anything like the second... I will not see it, if it's anything like the first on... I will not see it. This one has more alien robots and a plot! That I won't see, or read!! So yeah! All that! One thing I WILL say is that, after she left the franchise, Megan Fox said that she didn't like the way Michael Bay treated her and over-sexualized her (I know right?), but the new girl they cast in her place was a Victoria's Secret model who has worked with Bay before, that must means she's more willing to be made into that? Who knows. All I know is that Shia LaBeouf was reported saying that that's just Bay's way of doing things, making females sex symbols.
But there it is, a quickie about giant fighting alien robots. If you loved the films and disagree with me, let me know, I dig the feedback!
Now for some good shit! My album recommendation today is The Knife by The Knife, it's Swedish electronica so if you're into that electric sound and dig foreigners singing, this one's for you, check it out. My movie for today is... No Country For Old Men by the Coen Brothers, the film is about a cowboy who finds a large sum of drug money and gets chased by a mercenary. It's excellent and brutal, if you like Westerns and shit, check out this one here.
But there she is, in all her glory, my next blog post... after telling you all that I wouldn't do anymore... have a happy Saturday and enjoy life (especially if you're not being flooded).
ANYWAY, we're onto the third in the epic robot trilogy, this one so wonderfully titled Transformers: Dark of The Moon. NOW, I have not seen this film, I do not plan on seeing this film (unless I see it on DVD somewhere down the line), but I can make assumptions as to how it is (and how bad it is), based on the other Transformer films.
Now, I'm going to do a run down of the Transformers films... first in the trilogy is the 2007 film Transformers. If you were like me, when you heard about this project way back in '07, you were thinking, "what the fuck? they're making a film about Transformers? like those little toys I played with when I was little?" (because you probably didn't see the cartoon unless you were either in your 30s or in your 10s after the film came out). Even though it sounded weird though, you thought you'd check it out... and you did. The other thing you probably questioned upon hearing it was Shia LaBeouf's role in the movie (considering that before this film made him an action star, he was a kid on the Disney channel). Now that I have all of those thoughts out of the way, on to the film. Transformers was one of those movies that was actually very interesting. The CGI didn't make you want to completely vomit, the action was well done and it's Transformers, who DIDN'T wanna see gigantic transforming space robots fight one another? You could even overlook some of the bad shit, like the horrible Bush spoof used for comedy that will be outdated in a year, the really lame sex jokes, the fact that a lot of the transformers had giant metal bug faces, the overuse of Megan Fox conveniently bending over in barely any clothes, how purely retarded and oblivious the parents were and Shia LaBeouf's bitchy whiny bitch-ness. You could probably overlook how lame the term "AllSpark" was and how many times they felt they needed to say it. This movie had it's redeeming qualities, it had a pretty cool fight scene to finish it off and it was actually decently executed. However, it has major major flaws that just make it awful. Other than the ones that you overlooked were, the relentless product placement (eBay, Mountain Dew, GM, fucking everything was plugged in this film!), another thing is the lame acting (John Turturro played a very annoying character, Shia LaBeouf played and even more annoying character and Megan Fox didn't really have to act, just look like Angelina Jolie and be exploited). The movie was sabotaged with shit to sell tickets, when in all actuality just having a bunch of giant fucking robots would probably have been enough to sell tickets (dumb asses!), I would say if you're gonna watch a Transformers movie, make it the first one, otherwise don't bother.The second film in this beautiful series of explosion filled films is titled Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen (2009). In this film the Deceptacons revive their dead leader Megatron and try to get some shit and destroy the Earth and Sun and some shit, I don't care. THIS time though, they're following some other long lost evil robot called The Fallen! (ooooh, aaaaaah). This film has a lot of what the last film had girls being over-sexualized, explosions, robots, fighting, the military, yadda yadda, except THIS one had parts in Egypt and a robot broke out of the pyramids! (ooooh, aaaaah). I dunno, really this film was a lot worse than the first one (I know, crazy right?). It's a sequel and didn't really need to be made. It had less impressive CGI, less of a decent plot but the same lame jokes (this time they weren't as sexual though). In fact, this film was such a pathetic sequel I only saw it once and don't really remember it, I dunno, I don't have much to say except it made me angry that a Transformer could turn into a person, I'm pretty sure they could never copy organic things (AND she had a giant snake knife come out of her ass). I dunno, I wouldn't watch it but you'll do what you want.
And now the third one Transformers: Dark of The Moon (2011). I'll say this if it's anything like the second... I will not see it, if it's anything like the first on... I will not see it. This one has more alien robots and a plot! That I won't see, or read!! So yeah! All that! One thing I WILL say is that, after she left the franchise, Megan Fox said that she didn't like the way Michael Bay treated her and over-sexualized her (I know right?), but the new girl they cast in her place was a Victoria's Secret model who has worked with Bay before, that must means she's more willing to be made into that? Who knows. All I know is that Shia LaBeouf was reported saying that that's just Bay's way of doing things, making females sex symbols.But there it is, a quickie about giant fighting alien robots. If you loved the films and disagree with me, let me know, I dig the feedback!
Now for some good shit! My album recommendation today is The Knife by The Knife, it's Swedish electronica so if you're into that electric sound and dig foreigners singing, this one's for you, check it out. My movie for today is... No Country For Old Men by the Coen Brothers, the film is about a cowboy who finds a large sum of drug money and gets chased by a mercenary. It's excellent and brutal, if you like Westerns and shit, check out this one here.
But there she is, in all her glory, my next blog post... after telling you all that I wouldn't do anymore... have a happy Saturday and enjoy life (especially if you're not being flooded).
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